Friday, February 27, 2015

The Birthday Blog

My mom, my sister Bobbie, Dawson and Evan all have birthdays in the month of February. If my mom or my sister had asked my permission before being born, I'd have suggested an August and September date for them to be sure. Spacial Birthday Planning. 
In honor of their birthdays, here is a picture of me and my mom:
And me and Bobbie:
Dawson asked to do Laser tag this year. Of course, you should all remember that I came in first in a game in Laser tag on a staff retreat one year. "Roxstar".
So, we celebrated his 9th year of life at the Brunswick Zone with 3 of his buddies.
They had the entire laser tag arena to themselves. Is it an arena? What is it? 
 And they were able to play games in the arcade area. Personally, I prefer the game where you sit at the table and check Facebook on your phone. 
Before the party came to an end, Jason gave Evan a Sour Head candy.
 We had a combined party for Dawson and Evan at our house just a few days later.
Look at this cute raspberry filled cake I didn't make. I'll bet you thought it was Godiva Chocolate creme filled. 
I'd like to bring your attention to the way Evan blows out candles:
Is anyone else as annoyed by their own voice on video as I am by mine? I guess I can never be famous. Unless I write a book.
Birthdays bring out the best in siblings. For an hour or two.
 Jason and I took Evan to Chuck E. Cheese for his birthday yesterday while Dawson was at school. Of course, we stopped and had pizza at Old Chicago beforehand. We have standards.
Prior to leaving for Chuck E. Cheese, we gave Evan a birthday present. It was a plethora of noise makers, including a kazoo:
Jason has determined that the ceiling at Old Chicago looks like a church basement.
 I forgot my Clorox wipes, so I made Evan wear a hazmat suit to play games. Okay. I also forgot his hazmat suit.
I'll confess that I scoured the room looking for games that had tickets kids left behind and I took them. The ticket muncher never figured it out.
Slowest.Ride.Ever:
 There is a video of Dawson riding this same thing at the same Germ E. Cheese several years go. 
I'd say his equestrian skills were developed here. Thanks Chuck.
As birthdays go, next year I think we should do a Caribbean Cruise. And I can check Facebook in the lounge while they open presents.

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

The Christmas Scam

I'm super excited because I received another scam email yesterday at work.  This one will really tug on your heart strings.
I took no small delay in forming my reply. 
I accidentally cut off the remainder of my email but I said -and I quote:
 "I look forward to hearing from you soon!" End quote
Then I hit SEND.
And it was fun. Yay!
I love a good scam.

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Happy New Year!

Only the 6th day of the new year and I need a break. Or maybe a coffee mug that says "You're My Favorite". 
For the past 2 weeks, Dawson has been working endlessly on a stop motion film. When I say "Dawson has" I actually mean "Joy has" because as a result of this new-found fascination, I have labored long hours in a movie editing system to make his dream come true. Which actually turned Dawson into a Director Diva of sorts.. .making demands of me that couldn't be fulfilled like, "Mommy! I didn't say I wanted music at that part!"
One day Dawson had the idea to take his Transformer toy and take 100 pictures of it on the iPad while making the toy transform. When Jason used the iPad one day he saw that the data on it was maxed out and realized that Dawson had been taking hundreds of pictures on it... not realizing that Dawson had been using it to make a stop motion video. The pictures were erased and Dawson was devastated.
In order to make amends, Jason let Dawson use our Canon camera to take new pictures. I was a bit concerned, not really because it's an expensive camera.. but because the thing holds 5,000 photos and I didn't want to watch that many pictures flash across the screen in one sitting. Selfish. I know.
Dawson got the Optimus Prime Transformer he wanted for Christmas so he set to work making a stop motion film using his Transformers and his Emmet Lego guy (a lego set he got based on the Lego Movie). When he was finished, he asked if his pictures could be made into a video, and would you believe I found out that I have a video editing software on my laptop? 
I was able to upload all of Dawson's pictures to the software and out pooped (ha! accidentally typed "pooped" instead of "popped" but I think it's funny. so I'm not correcting it) this video. Then 30 million hours later I figured out how to add sound and let him do some of his own sound effects. 
Mostly, the video might not make sense. (just keeping it real). But I did my best to let Dawson keep it the way he wanted and only corrected a few things. 
Ladies and Gentleman, I present to you:
Transformers: Age of Emmet Extinction
Editors Note** the movie is 5 minutes long

Monday, December 29, 2014

Tis the Season to Be Jolly: Christmas 2014

To inaugurate the season, we took the boys to see Christmas lights. That sentence reeks with boredom. But using the word "inaugurate", really spices things up.
There's a house near ours that decorates and the lights are set to music. 101.9 FM to be exact. Evan was very sick and we had no idea how sick he was until we got home and he kept us me up 3 days straight coughing. Jason left for a business trip. I don't know why he doesn't take Evan with him. 
 On the eve of Christmas Eve, we let the boys have a camp out in our room. Really, it wasn't camping, but sleeping on the floor. But I can call it camping so I just did.
I began to think Christmas was never.going.to.come. this year. Mostly because everyday since Thanksgiving, Dawson spoke to me about Christmas gifts and what he wanted and made suggestions as to where we should shop. To say he was looking forward to Christmas would be an understatement.
Jason took this picture on his phone on Christmas morning. I thought it turned out rather spectacular. The tree is up so high off the ground, it made me feel like we should have purchased only gifts that were 4 foot tall or taller. 
 This picture is the one he took on our Canon camera. Those are my pink pajama clad knees. That's where I sit in the morning to read my bible. I must say, reading your bible by a lit Christmas tree that is covered in "Joy" ornaments adds a whole new dimension to devotions.
 I begged the boys to let us a take a picture of them coming down the stairs that morning. I also had to threaten the elimination of one gift per minute that they didn't cooperate.
 Stockings first. To supersede this tradition would diminish Christmas. I totally just used the word supersede correctly in a sentence.
 Jason forced me to take part in a pre-shower Christmas picture, resulting in stringy hair and the color pink. Aunt Bev, I accept your apology. There are more where this came from.
 Time to open presents!
 Dawson's theme this year was Transformers. He watches Transformers 4 on repeat. That being said, he had a bit of a pout session up in his room when Christmas was over because I apparently ordered the wrong "Slug" and "Scorn" transformers. The one's I purchased were for ages 5+ and changed in only 8 steps. God forbid!
 The Optimus Prime Transformer we bought him was the "Red Ryder BB Gun with compass and a stock and this thing which tells time". The very toy he pleaded, begged, and all around wouldn't stop talking about for one month straight. 
 Evan is obsessed with trash and garbage trucks. As a matter of fact, he's currently sitting at the kitchen island watching garbage trucks on youtube using my phone. No lie. He recently made his aunt Nessa let him watch the same thing on her phone when she babysat a couple of weeks ago. 
I'll confess, Jason and I were a tiny bit ecstatic when we found this one at TJ Maxx. And now that I've mentioned them by name in a public forum, I'm fully expecting a $500 gift card to arrive in the mail from them saying how much they appreciate me.
 Once the presents are all opened and equally admired, we force the children through our usual routine of Christmas pictures: 
Construction equipment brought to you courtesy of Evan's Excavation business.
 Of course, I spend hours on my hair.
 For whatever reason, I was in the mood for sepia. I'm not on any depression medication or anything, so my moods are subject to change without notification.
 Jason is very photogenic. If I were as photogenic as he is, I probably wouldn't feel the need to color, cut or otherwise maim my hair on a regular basis.
 Good-bye Christmas. 
Happy New Year!

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

10 Years of Christmas Hair.

Let me clarify that when I say "Christmas" I am using it in the generic sense of the term meaning "any time of year".  This is because I had a difficult time finding pictures of my hair on, or near Christmas. However, these photo's do represent each year for the past 10 years. 
Looking at old pictures gives you a new perspective on your hair. 
2003:
Wedding hair which was highlighted and lowlighted and medium length! Super bright white teeth brought to you by Crest White Strips. They should probably use me for a commercial.
2004:
My wedding hair had grown out so I kept highlighting over the top of it with a box kit until I was rather blond like you see here. I'm not sure I like the color, but maybe the length is okay. I also didn't have a perm. That's crunchy stuff in my hair.
2005a:
This was the day I had announced to my family that we were pregnant with Dawson. Well I was the one pregnant but you are supposed to say "we" right? I had just colored my hair with Clairol Caribbean Caramel. My little niece Kazlan likes my hair color. I can tell by her cuteness.
2005b:
Just a few weeks later and I was still pregnant but I don't think I look pregnant do you? We're at the wedding of Jason's cousin Tiffany. I had just told their family that I was pregnant and Jason's Aunt Nora said she could tell! It doesn't matter, I had my Pepsi and this is a closer depiction of how I did my Caribbean Caramel hair.
2006:
Darker hair but about the same length. I think I would be just as cute if I was bald like Dawson. I looked younger in 2006. I was probably using Proactiv.
2006b:
Just a few short months after the previous picture was taken I decided highlights were in order. I was going for highlights the same color as a rotisserie chicken. I'd like you all to know that Jason had a t-shirt made for me with this picture on it.
2007:
My cousin Joe's wedding and I decided to go with darker hair. Me and my sister Bobbie. Bobbie keeps her hair highlighted and long now. Maybe I should have my hair highlighted and long? 
2008:
Darker longer hair in San Diego, CA. I think I like side swept bangs. Maybe I should consider a wig.
2008b:
I miss the white pants I'm wearing. I'm pretty sure that's the only point to this picture because my hair looks mostly the same.
2009:
Shoulder length and highlighted. I think I wanted my hair to match Dawson's.
2010:
Longer hair caramel color again. I have I never been able to make up my mind? No. No I have not.
2010b:
Outdoor lighting on caramel hair. And Cheetos in Dawson's mouth.
2011:
Long dark straight hair. This color and length is how it has remained since 2011. Maybe that's why I'm bored. I'd also say I need a tan.
2012:
Mother's Day. Hair is okay but I look tired. Maybe I should highlight my eyebrows.
2013:
I don't think I have highlights, I'm outside and it makes my hair look orange which I don't.like.at.all. Good thing Evan is so cute, to make up for my iron-hair look.
2013b:
By Christmas inside, my hair looked darker. I need a new way to style it. Mohawk maybe.
2014:
Mother's Day this year. I have a few more layers now, but the same color. I think I look like Medusa in this picture.
Finally bringing 1 million pictures of me to a close. 
Tell me what to do with my hair. 
Thank you.